“I was going to make a smart-ass joke about putting the cheese on the graham crackers,” the young cashier said as she handed me my bag of cheese and graham crackers. “Oh. That’s exactly what I’m doing,” I replied. “Well, I hope you like it.” I do like it, young cashier. I like it so much I have half a mind to drive back to Fred Meyer and tell you all about it, but that would be off-putting (at best).
Instead, I’ll tell you, the person reading this: You should put cheese on graham crackers. The fancier, the better.
Before you start in with a childish and unserious “that’s weird,” take a moment to remember that there is an obvious precedent for such a pairing: It’s called cheesecake, and it rules. Then there is the cheese plate, which almost always features an assortment of candied nuts and other sweet treats to pair with the cheese, including honey, a prominent ingredient in graham crackers. (The most popular brand is called “Honey Maid,” after all.)
Putting a fancy cheese on a graham cracker streamlines your cheese-eating experience. It offers a sweet, nutty counterpoint to salty, pungent cheese, and makes the bite feel a touch dessert-like, which is perfect, because too few people and places offer the cheese plate as a dessert option.
Pick a strong, intensely-flavored cheese for the best results. Something like a funky, fruity blue, aggressively sharp and crumbly cheddar, or aged, crystal-flecked gouda. A mushroomy brie would also be fun. You want the cheese to dominate the graham cracker, and force it into a supporting, but complementary, role. The sweetness should come at the end, after your palate processes the cheese, to offer a quick, sugary respite before you dive back in for more. Eat it as a snack, eat it as dessert, eat it as a lark. Just eat it. I think you’ll like it.