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CHICAGO, IL—Admitting that they had made no significant progress in understanding where they stood in the present climate, Country Time CEO Howard Worth told reporters Thursday that he was unsure if his company was supposed to be racist or not. “Certainly, it seems like the name Country Time is idealizing some long lost past of rural America, but as far as we can see it isn’t explicitly related to the antebellum South or anything racial,” said Worth, stressing that that the difficulties were only compounded by Country Time’s lack of a clear mascot or vintage advertising spots to go off. “There’s nothing linking lemons or wooden stands to white supremacy, right? Or are there? Is the fact that we sponsored NASCAR something—I think that’d be straining things, but maybe I’m wrong? Christ, we’re completely lost here.” At press time, the CEO issued an apology after noticing the swastika and burning cross hidden in the Country Time logo.



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