You may already have started celebrating Pride month as a family, whether by talking to your kids about what it means to identify as LGBTQ, seeking out local events, or leaning in on the rainbow crafts and baked goods. But if your child identifies as LGBTQ, you may be wondering what else you can or should be doing to acknowledge the month.
Ask them how they want to celebrate
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First, it’s important to acknowledge that while you can come up with all the ideas in the world, and cover your home in rainbows, and make a list of all the local events you can attend together, your celebrations should ultimately reflect your child’s needs and feelings. Maybe they want the whole family to pile in the car to head to the local Pride festival—or maybe they’d rather go with a friend (or not celebrate at all). Tell them you want to acknowledge the month and celebrate their individuality, but also that you want to respect any boundaries or priorities they may have.
They might already have some ideas, or they may not want to do much at all. Follow their lead on this—but if they want to celebrate or acknowledge the month and aren’t sure how, here are some ideas you could suggest, or do on your own.
Offer to host a Pride party
You are—hopefully—willing (and happy) to attend any Pride events they’d like to go to, but if they prefer to keep the celebration smaller and more private, you can offer to host your own Pride party at home. Who they may want to invite or what that party might look like will differ based on whether they’re out to family and friends—and how supportive those family and friends have been.
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You can plan the celebration in whatever way makes the most sense for them, from a loud, colorful bash to a small gathering of their closest and most supportive loved ones.
Have a family LGBTQ movie night (or nights)
Chances are decent that there are a slew of movies out there that explore modern LGBTQ history that you’ve never seen: Now is the time! As Ross Johnson recently wrote for Lifehacker:
There are as many paths to exploring queer history as there are people who have lived it, and many legends we’ve nearly forgotten about who, in a more just world, would be household names. History can provide inspiration, and can also help us to avoid making the same damn mistakes again and again—mistakes like forgetting that trans people of color were at the vanguard of gay liberation.
Pride is a time to celebrate, honor, and remember all of it, whether you’re trans, bi, ace, poly, pan, intersex, nonbinary, or anywhere else on the gender and sexual identity and expression spectrum… or just proud to support your queer friends.
Johnson has compiled a list of 30 of the most important queer movies ever made, which you can find here. Have everyone in the family pick a movie (or three), pop some popcorn, and start watching.
Consider how inclusive your own home is
It’s great to talk to your child about how to recognize the month, but Pride is something that should extend throughout the year, particularly within your home. Inclusivity, love, and support are things they’ll need in July and August, too, and there may be ways you’re inadvertently not showing them those things.
Be aware of the way your own language may need some updating to become more inclusive. You might want to start using more terms like “partner” or “significant other” rather than boyfriend or girlfriend, and avoid gendering things by describing them “girly” or “manly.” And definitely, definitely use their preferred pronouns.
If the predominant imagery in your home represents straight, cis gender people, look for ways to diversify and add more inclusive images and media into your everyday lives. You can also donate to support an LGBTQ organization in your child’s honor—and tell them you did so.